Country at War

Well I woke up this morning with a feeling of dread
And the words lead with love running through my head
But that line don’t work if the line’s gone dead
There are some things that I think need to be said
So I’m gonna say ’em

You used to ask me around when it was good for you
And then punch out the lights leave me black and blue
Took the last of the cash like it was your due
There are some bills you could pay if you wanted to
But you’ll never pay ’em

This was a family
This is a family no more
This was a nation
This is a country at war
You called me godless and you called me a whore
Do you remember

Well the battle lines were drawn around blood and pain
In a boxing ring covered with spit and stains
Determined to fight until the last one was slain
And when I wanted out and said never again
Instead I got christened
And you stole my car and drove it till it ran out of gas
Panhandled for more so the good times could last
Smashed it and crashed it and called it a blast
And I listened

This was a family
This is a family no more
This was a nation
This is a country at war
You asked me to stand up so you could knock me to the floor
Do you remember

The truth is I wish I didn’t have to leave
I wish it weren’t easier to be blind than to see
But if I’m gonna be self-righteous I guess that’s what I’ll be
It’s a long-standing root holding up a dead tree
That’s just rotten
And I thought about trying to write you a letter
But I did this instead and it made me feel better
‘Cause maybe some things that stay unsaid stay unfettered
And now you won’t have to crawl through the gutter to get her
Maybe this way it just gets forgotten

This was a family
This is a family no more
This was a nation
This is a country at war
I said all I had to say
I ain’t gonna say anymore

Not Okay

There are bears in the mountains
There are rabbits in the yard
I’ve been trying not to panic
But it’s getting hard
I threw stones in the river
But the river ran dry
I’ve been feeling lower and lower
While everybody else gets high

It’s not okay
It’s not okay
To feel this way

There is barking in the darkness
Wolves rolling around like lovers
Inside a fire’s going
But I’m hiding under the covers

It’s not okay
It’s not okay
To feel this way

We had years to figure it all out
But the days just came and went
It’s been raining for three weeks now
And the money’s all been spent
And I can’t explain it

There are bears in the mountains
There are rabbits in the yard
I’ve been trying not to panic
But it’s getting hard

It’s not okay
It’s not okay
To feel this way

Not Forgotten

Oh Mary oh Joseph oh Lord
Somebody help me get up off this floor
Heart in my hand and you walking away
And it’s just a moment it’s just a day
Oh Mama oh Daddy oh yeah
The search for freedom we wanted so bad
They said it was dangerous
They said not to waste it
But they dangled it so close
They dared us to taste it

The older I get
The less I know
The less I understand
Ain’t that just how it goes
But I wanted to tell you
I think of you often
I think of you fondly
You are not forgotten

You always told me
I could do anything
I could reach anybody
I could stand up and sing
And it made me so angry
When you pointed to the sky
And said all things will happen
In their own sweet time

The older I get
The less I know
The less I understand
Ain’t that just how it goes
But I wanted to tell you
I think of you often
I think of you fondly
You are not forgotten

And every generation has to settle someone else’s score
The latch keys of innocents
The 20 year war
And if X marks the spot for everything you think you’re gonna find
Well there is no buried treasure
There’s just what gets left behind

I seem to live my life
Between pieces of paper
Between swatches of fabric
Dreams managed and tapered
I’ve never seen the Northern lights
But I’d still like to try
I like to think of you out there
Pointing up at the sky

The older I get
The less I know
The less I understand
Ain’t that just how it goes
But I wanted to tell you
I think of you often
I think of you fondly
You are not forgotten

Luca’s Song

Texas sage is coming into bloom
One hundred ten degrees by noon
I can’t keep you here by force
You fade and follow your own course
You smell like rosemary and lavendar
I keep your birthday on my calendar
I’ll send you off with the full moon
I know the end is coming soon

Well that was another time
And that was another place
You kept my heart alive
You kissed my changing face
That was another world
And I was another girl
I was another girl
I was another girl

Will you teach me everything you know
Just give it all to me before you go
I’ll write in down in my notebook
Before I let you off the hook
I know you’re ready to get on with it
I know you don’t want me to think you quit
There’s more to lose for you than gain
You’re gone before the winter rain

Well that was another time
And that was another place
You kept my heart alive
You kissed my changing face
That was another world
And I was another girl
I was another girl
I was another girl

Texas sage is coming into bloom
One hundred ten degrees by noon
You stayed as long as you were able
I keep your ashes on my table

Well that was another time
And that was another place
You kept my heart alive
You kissed my changing face
That was another world
And I was another girl
I was another girl
I was another girl

Honey Bunny

Late last night I told a joke
Nobody thought it was funny
Something to do with something you smoke
Something to do with money
But oh don’t it go that way sometimes honey bunny
Sometimes you feel like you’re on fire
Sometimes you feel like running

But laughing and crying
Are two sides of the same feeling
Both things come for healing
Down on the floor or up on the ceiling
Oh honey bunny we got us no doubt about it
Whisper it or shout it
I got you and you got me
And everyone else has to earn it

Now sometimes everybody feels so good
And sometimes everybody don’t
Some days we’re just laughing away
Some nights we just won’t
But oh don’t it go that way sometimes honey bunny
Sometimes you’re on top of the world
Sometimes you’re just a dummy

Laughing and crying
Are two sides of the same feeling
Both things come for healing
Down on the floor or up on the ceiling
Oh honey bunny we got us no doubt about it
Whisper it or shout it
I got you and you got me
And everyone else has to earn it

We got nothing to prove
To no one else
We got our own dance
Let them dance themselves

Now somebody’s always gonna try to get you
To let ’em somehow justify
Somebody else’s missteps mistakes
Somebody else’s lie
Now I’m all in favor of friends to savor
I’m all for a real good time
But don’t get me all wrapped up in your life
I’m wrapped up in mine

Laughing and crying
Are two sides of the same feeling
Both things come for healing
Down on the floor or up on the ceiling
Oh honey bunny we got us no doubt about it
Whisper it or shout it
I got you and you got me
And everyone else has to earn it

Keep Your Counsel

When you go look me in the eye
When you go look me in the eye
I can tell what’s behind ’em
I can tell if you’ve been lyin’
For a while we got so far
For a while we were so close
Driving fast in your car
Singing along with all our ghosts

I can tell that you want to yell
But what’s done is already done
You keep your counsel to yourself
I will try to hold my tongue

Well here we are at the top of the mountain
Watching the world set on fire
Watching the roads crumble around us
Watching the flames climb higher and higher
And I don’t even remember how we got up here
But I can’t forget where it is we’re going
And I don’t know what’s left to tether us
What secret tailor won’t stop sewing

I can tell that you want to yell
But what’s done is already done
You keep your counsel to yourself
I will try to hold my tongue

When the burning awakens you
To remind you that your soul is on fire
And you’re calling out for me to come to you
And pull you out of your own mire
Come on why can’t you meet me in the middle
Even if it’s just the middle of the night
Tell me why we gotta keep walking around with blinders
Like someone might ruin our surprise

I can tell that you want to yell
But what’s done is already done
You keep your counsel to yourself
I will try to hold my tongue

You’ve Been On My Mind

Full moon fever
Like butterflies and bees
All the feelings
Come swarming in the light
Yeah the memories
Come sweeping across the valley
Come tripping down the alley
In the middle of the night

You’ve been on my mind
You’ve been on my mind
For some time

All the oceans
Deserts and fields
Everything between us
That never got healed
For a while there we thought we knew
All the things we could and could not do
Thought we’d figured out some stuff was true
Turned out it was a lie

You’ve been on my mind
You’ve been on my mind
For some time

If past and future can mend their fences
If we can find our way into forgiveness
If I get one more chance to make amends
I’d like to offer up my innocence
I offer up my innocence

Now it’s springtime in Texas
And the mountain laurel’s blooming
Feels like a resurrection
Of another me and you
And it smells like grape soda
The air just smells like grape soda
Smells like being 24
And everything’s still new

You’ve been on my mind
You’ve been on my mind
For some time

You Did Good

Wake up in the morning
Shake the shadows from your head
Cast your eyes around the room
Crawl out of bed
And I know it ain’t been easy
Lord knows it’s been hard
Lord knows we’ve been kicked
Lord knows we’ve got scars

You didn’t disappoint me
I know you worried that you would
You didn’t disappoint me
You did good

And in the afternoon
Think of things you might have done
Think of things you wished you’d handled better
Under the light of the sun
But looking back never got me far
Never fixed or made things fair
Never taught me much of anything
Except how to stay scared

You didn’t disappoint me
I know you worried that you would
You didn’t disappoint me
You did good

You can call out the most terrible names
But it’s not doing any good
And we might end up going up in flames
But we all did the best that we could

And in the evening
When your eyes are red and dry
Come and rinse them with cool water
Rest your head down on my thigh
May your sleep be easier
May your dreams be light
May you keep your own fire burning
To guide you through the night

You didn’t disappoint me
I know you worried that you would
You didn’t disappoint me
You did good

Coming Around

The sky’s all darkening
Watch the aspen leaves blow
Takes a hundred thousand different roots
Just to get one tree to grow
The lightning strikes
Deals its mighty blow
And it’s us winding down around the mountain
Following our little road

Coming down
Coming around
Coming down
Coming around

While you were dreaming of mercy
And the old ones lined up in a row
All the while we’ve been fast asleep
They were whispering to us “grow”

Coming down
Coming around
Coming down
Coming around

The other night I saw two deer
In the twilight’s evening glow
With their antlers soft and spongey still
Sniffing out which way to go

Coming down
Coming around
Coming down
Coming around